regarding commitment

Re-published (sans edits) from the NYU Entrepreneur's Blog.

Recently, I was asked to speak with a class of kick-ass grad students at NYU-Poly. The instructor of the class, famous for asking tough but hyper-relevant questions, asked me the following:

‘What if you get to a point where you know it’s not working, and it’s time to give it up?”

I smiled. One thing I have discovered during this endeavor is the liberating force of human commitment. My definition of marriage is a good analogy for this. The whole point of marriage, the only difference between marriage and dating, is the vocal commitment made to spend the rest of your life together. By definition, marriage eliminates the option to break up (bear with me and ignore divorce for a moment). Though this finality might terrify many people, it is in fact liberating. That one, huge decision is already made for you. And, the resounding nature of its finality elucidates every other option – if you can’t give up then you will be infinitely more dedicated to finding another solution to your conflict.

Bottom line – I have committed to my company. Now look, I can be certain of a few things – that we face staggering odds, that we will encounter mind-numbing, smash-your-head-against-the-screen challenges, that the road not taken is not taken for a reason. But I can also be certain of one other thing – that we will not stop. That we will not quit. And that in the end, we will triumph.

“But what if you’re genuinely just being silly and your idea isn’t realistic?” The point is that I have been in this long enough – I have glimpsed the plausible outcomes and tested my love of the business, the industry, and the work to be done, and I have not found them wanting. In the same way that I could never commit to a wife without the confidence in her and us, I couldn’t commit to a business after just a one-night brainstorm or honeymoon launch.

“What about when things get tough? Really tough?” Two things. First, the stronger your commitment, the more powerful your ability to find alternatives. When things get tougher, you will just get more creative. And second, true commitment is impossible until you have understood and accepted the beauty of adversity. Nothing will kill you (in startupland, at least); it will only embolden, enlighten and strengthen you. I deeply appreciate the challenges we’ve already faced because my mind has toughened ten-fold as a result. Adversity (if this startup dream can even so blasphemously be called that) is healthy for the soul. Take pleasure in it.